City Severs Ties With Sleeping Giant

Written by Candy Eyeful Tuesday, 11 November 2008

The Ski Town City Council has severed ties with longtime local icon Sleeping Giant and has signed a five year local iconic image contract with South Routt landmark Finger Rock.  Finger Rock, no relation to Kid Rock, Chris Rock or The Rock, formerly was located right on State Highway 131 two miles south of Yampa and will begin these new duties just as soon as this issue of the Pirate and Yesterday hits the streets. 

A lone finger now graces the horizon where the Sleeping Giant made hes bed for so many generations.

As soon as he is ensconced in his new job, there will be a slight name change to The Finger Rock (see accompanying photograph).  "This is a real step up for me," said Mr. Rock, "both in attitude and location.  My apologies to Finger Rock Fish Hatchery," which will be renamed Middle of B.F. Nowhere Fish Hatchery.

Scari Helmetheadski, Ski Town City Council President Pro-temski, had this to say about the change.  "Sleeping Giant did a good job in his time.  But he represented a laid-back, twentieth century mindset that no longer works in these edgy, no-nonsense times.  I think the public has grown tired of a highly paid public official doing so much sleeping on the job.  I share The Finger  Rock's sentiment: if you don't like it, @#*&in' move!"

Sleeping Giant, meanwhile, is his usual philosophical self about the change.  He received a generous severance package from the city and he plans on doing some travelling before he settles down again.  "I've been corresponding with the San Francisco Giants and the New York Giants regarding the possibility of doing some promotional work for them.  And there are still plenty of sleepy little towns across this great land of ours who would love to see the sun setting behind me.  I have no hard feelings toward The Finger Rock.  I'm sure he will do a great job flipping off this end of the valley.  But, I have a feeling that when the next issue of the Pirate and Yesterday comes along, I'll be back."