Written by The Pirate Sunday, 01 February 2015
Written by Jack Hoff Thursday, 29 January 2015
Embattled NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell held a press conference to elaborate on a confusing portion of the league's new abuse policies.
"To be clear, it is definitely NOT OK to beat any other member of your family, or strangers or any other person or even animal," said Goodell. "But there will NOT be ANY suspensions or penalties levied for beating yourself. We had a lot of questions about that, as it's apparently highly practiced throughout our league. Although some religions, parents and others frown on the practice, it is not illegal in the NFL. You may or may not go blind, but taking that risk is up to the individual."
Goodell hopes the NFL can be a leading example for other sporting leagues and communities in specifying the difference between beating on others and beating on yourself.
"We're proud of our new policy and awareness campaign," added Goodell. "And this is an issue that pertains to women as well as men, as studies show that women are just as likely as men to 'beat themselves,' although the mechanics and terminology often are different."Add a comment
Written by Carson DaStreet Friday, 21 November 2014
The average Steamboat Springs motorist, who does not want to park more than 20 feet from their destination, has been growing ever more frustrated by the difficulty incurred trying to find these prime parking places. Now there is hope for finding a solution, according to Steamboat Springs Director of Transportation, Manny Mustbekidding.
At a morning news conference at City Hall, Mustbekidding told reporters and members of the public about an "ongoing, long-term parking study that will prove, once and for all, that we actually appear to be doing something about this problem." A hush fell over the expectant gathering. "For the last 22 years, the reputable Durango-based firm Suburban Explorer has sent 387 of their most- trusted agents into Downtown Steamboat Springs every morning in vehicles ranging from Subarus to SUVs to UPS trucks, to study the availability of parking and the effect of double-parking on traffic."
Mustbekidding quieted the loudly laughing audience, then...Add a comment
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