Pirate Theatre Monthly Daily Show (Episode 2)

•Written by The Pirate• ••Monday•, 12 •August• 2013•

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Oscar Mayer Changes Slogan, Abandons Wiener Name

•Written by Frank N. Beans• ••Wednesday•, 31 •July• 2013•

Due to continuing backlash caused by the online sexual exploits of former House Representative Anthony Weiner and current New York City mayoral candidate, processed-meat giant Oscar Mayer has unceremoniously dropped the word wiener, which is spelled differently but pronounced the same, from its products and slogans.

 

Due to a negative perception of the word wiener caused by a recent political scandal, Oscar Mayer changed all of its iconic marketing to strip out the offending word, including for the newly named Penis-Shaped Meatmobile.Due to a negative perception of the word wiener caused by a recent political scandal, Oscar Mayer changed all of its iconic marketing to strip out the offending word, including for the newly named Penis-Shaped Meatmobile."Thanks to one sleazy politician, the word wiener has been tarnished to the point that we can't associate with it anymore," said company spokesperson Beau Lonie. "Now all you hear is 'Weiner sucks' or 'that Weiner is disgusting,' and that's not in line with Oscar Mayer products."

To help prevent small children or juvenile men from giggling at every mention of wiener, the hot dog's famous jingle has been changed to incorporate the product's new name:

I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Penis-Shaped Meat
That is what I'd truly like to be
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer Penis-Shaped Meat
Everyone would be in love with me.

"We feel that Oscar Mayer Penis-Shaped Meat is more dignified than the now-maligned wiener name," added Louie. "We...

•Add a comment•

•Read more: Oscar Mayer Changes Slogan, Abandons Wiener Name•

Pirate Theatre Monthly Daily Show (Episode 1)

•Written by The Pirate• ••Thursday•, 18 •July• 2013•

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•Page 5 of 30•

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Local Satire???

Let's face it: Where you live is pretty ridiculous. Your local politicians are buffoons. Your local celebrities take themselves way too seriously. The general population, including yourself, is either completely crazy or almost there.

This is equally true whether you live in Hollywood, Miami or Sheboygan. It's just a matter of scale. But what can you do about it?

Satire. If you can't beat 'em, make fun of 'em, and you just might beat 'em that way ...

In its many forms, satire has proven to be a great equalizer. Jon Stewart is one of the most influential people in America. If not for Tina Fey, Sarah Palin might be Vice President of the United States. When people realize that something is ridiculous, it loses its power.

This is where The Pirate comes in. There are many great outlets that satirize the "big issues" (and we do that, too). But we've also perfected the art of Local Satire. As you can see from our successful model in Steamboat Springs, Colorado, no town is too small to be skewered.

You don't know those people or what their issues are, but the people in Steamboat do, and they think it's hilarious. And you can do the same in your area, whether a city, town, school, company or whatever. That's Local Satire, and you'll be surprised at how effective it can be.

Then you can sell your own local advertising and make a little money on the side.

So if you want to start your own Local Pirate Web page and newsletter, click HERE and start your voyage.

It's FREE, and templates are set up so all you have to do is write funny articles (but if you need help creating witty graphics, we can do that, too, for a small fee).

Each of your Local subscribers will also receive a FREE Global Pirate newsletter along with your own. We take care of the newsletters, too, and you can send it as often (or not) as you'd like.

And if you'd just like to contribute an article or two for our "global" page, just send in what you think is funny. If we like it, we'll publish it under your name and location. Unlike other satire publications, we want to hear from you.

So, are you a Pirate?

Enter Amount:

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You can have new content from The Pirate e-mailed to you as a newsletter as soon as it's available. No need to waste time browsing the Internet!

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