Written by The Pirate Monday, 12 August 2013
Written by Frank N. Beans Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Due to continuing backlash caused by the online sexual exploits of former House Representative Anthony Weiner and current New York City mayoral candidate, processed-meat giant Oscar Mayer has unceremoniously dropped the word wiener, which is spelled differently but pronounced the same, from its products and slogans.
"Thanks to one sleazy politician, the word wiener has been tarnished to the point that we can't associate with it anymore," said company spokesperson Beau Lonie. "Now all you hear is 'Weiner sucks' or 'that Weiner is disgusting,' and that's not in line with Oscar Mayer products."
To help prevent small children or juvenile men from giggling at every mention of wiener, the hot dog's famous jingle has been changed to incorporate the product's new name:
I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Penis-Shaped Meat
That is what I'd truly like to be
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer Penis-Shaped Meat
Everyone would be in love with me.
"We feel that Oscar Mayer Penis-Shaped Meat is more dignified than the now-maligned wiener name," added Louie. "We...Add a comment
Written by The Pirate Thursday, 18 July 2013
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