Steamboat Springs
Sheriff Vehicles Go Black, Won't Go Back
Written by Kerri Fullwiththisstory Tuesday, 11 November 2008
In a
controversial move among its own office, the Steamboat Springs
Sheriff's Department recently painted several of its vehicles
black. Although strongly supported by Sheriff Stonedwall Jackson,
several older members of the department noticeably clucked and
wagged their fingers in opposition.
Several Steamboat Springs Sheriff's vehicles are sporting a bold new look.
"I just don't think it's appropriate for Steamboat Springs. This ain't New York," said Officer Rusty Curmudgeon, a third-generation Routt County resident nearing retirement. "I'm sure it's just an 'experimental phase' the Sheriff is going through. I bet he wanted to feel a little more dangerous, a little exotic. But what would his parents say?"
"Oh, no. It's not a phase. I'm never going back to white," countered Sheriff Jackson. "I've been attracted to black cars all my...
Add a commentRiverboat Gambling Coming Soon
Written by Marginally Hairy Tuesday, 11 November 2008
The World Infamous Slugboat Bar, Beanery and Meet Market, where beer has sloshed, feet have danced, guys have fought and women are always outnumbered, is moving, building and all, right onto the slopes of Mt. Werner. The raucous, rocking restaurant and bar will add Casino to its name as a clever, loophole-laden legal scheme allows the entire building to sit on stilts anchored in the newly daylighted Burgess Creek. The move will happen as soon as construction engineers can actually locate the hidden creek. "Whoever hid Burgess Creek really did an awesome job," said lead engineer Buck Naked.
The Slugboat will soon join the ranks of missing buildings in Ski Times Square when it is relocated to the yet-unlocated but soon-to-be daylighted Burgess Creek.
Attorney Guy Wise, representing the Slugboat, really did his homework, although some are saying he just copied it from a classmate. "Riverboat gambling is allowed on a vessel in a body of water. The size of the body of water doesn't matter, and the vessel doesn't even have to be floating, just 'in' the water," said an overly excited Wise. ...
Add a commentCity Council Approves "Bailout" for Struggling Realtors
Written by Richie Wantsahandoutnow Tuesday, 11 November 2008
With a
sharply contested 5-4 vote, Steamboat Springs City Council approved
a $70 million "bailout" for Steamboat's struggling real estate
market.
Struggling millionaire realtors received a $70 million check from City Council to help bail them out of these difficult times.
"The real estate market in this town has crashed," noted Scari Helmutheadski, the council's president pro-temski. "And they're the engine that drives our local economy. If they collapse, then the whole city will collapse, and we couldn't allow that to happen."
The proposal, which was submitted by a coalition of local realtors and developers, allows City Council to buy up to, for now, $70 million worth of "bad real estate" that realtors "overspeculated on" and now can't sell. The city has agreed to buy these crappy investments at 130 percent of their current sale pricing, which would translate to roughly 390 percent above market value. Any participating realtor in the program will then get a standard 8 percent commission from each end of the transaction that...
Add a commentRead more: City Council Approves "Bailout" for Struggling Realtors
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