Steamboat Springs
Millions Living on Sidewalks to Support Local Protest
Written by Rollie Fingers Friday, 04 April 2008
Hertie Gertie, the owner of the Dang Gummit Chinese restaurant in Ski Time Square, spoke again at last night's City Council meeting, noting that millions of people worldwide have joined him in his protest against City Council by living on the sidewalk, as he does each day in front of his restaurant.
According to Dang Gummit owner Hertie Gertie, millions of people are living on the sidewalk solely to show their support for his peaceful resistance against "liquor license tyranny."
Gertie, who now only speaks to City Council members via well-articulated farts, cited Internet searches that indicate a growing number of people supporting his cause by "hitting the streets."
"I think it's wonderful," farted Gertie to Anton Luinuci, president of Steamboat Springs City Council. "These people don't have to do this, you know. But they choose to live on the sidewalk, like I do, to show the rest of the world that I, Hertie Gertie, deserve to be able to sell booze to vacationing tourists.
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Extended Intracourse: Ski Corps Announces Season Enhancement
Written by Rob Meblind Friday, 04 April 2008
Intracourse,
current owner of the Steamboat Ski Area, released plans yesterday
to extend the 2007-08 ski season.
Dip Dandy, Director of Marketing and Mark-ups at the resort, told reporters that "We thought this would be a great way to celebrate this year's enormous snowfall. Steamboat has been engorged with snow this winter. We have received over 445 inches of Champagne Powder ® at mid-mountain already, and we just keep adding on the inches." According to Dandy, "skiers and riders will be able to make turns up on the hill until the snow is gone."
The original closing date was scheduled for Sunday, April 6, and would have been the earliest and most dysfunctional closing in Steamboat history. The season opened nine days late and would have been the shortest ever at 129 days including Leap Day if not for the enhancement.
Details of the augmentation were spelled out by Schneidly Whiplash, Director of Skier Servicing at the Steamboat ski...
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Bank Tellers Jailed
Written by Rob Meblind Friday, 04 April 2008
STEAMBOAT SPRINGS -- Two local women were arrested Yesterday on
suspicion of stealing more than 900,000 liters from account holders
at a Steamboat Springs bank.
Moody Dawn Spermaceti, of Milner, and Pamela Jism Fatka Lode, of
unincorporated Routt County, both 41, were arrested Thursday
morning at Sperm Bank of the Week in downtown Steamboat, where both
are employed as tellers. The women are accused of stealing the
deposits from multiple donors at Alpine Sperm Bank, where they
previously worked as collection agents.
Moody Dawn Spermaceti (top) and Pamela Jism Fatka Lode (bottom) were arrested at Sperm Bank of the West after being accused of stealing the deposits from multiple donors at Alpine Sperm Bank.
The 900,000 liter amount likely will increase as the investigation
continues, Steamboat Springs police Capt. Poel Sprae said.
Thursday's arrests were the result of a six-week undercover
operation.
Two alleged victims, Peter Wacksoff and Joe Slocum reported
sizeable thefts from their Alpine Sperm Bank accounts in
mid-January, prompting the investigation. Sprae said there could be
additional victims, and investigators are looking into the...
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- Dumpstergate: Rainbows Stealing Trash throughout Steamboat
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- Sleeping Giant Pregnant!
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